How to Stop Disagreements with NLP Techniques

Posted by Qt on March 08, 2011

By Dr. Vesna Grubacevic

When was the last time you had a misunderstanding or a disagreement with someone, either personally or professionally?  How much did that misunderstanding or miscommunication cost you in lost time, effort, energy, rework, duplication or a soured relationship?  Would you like to discover how you can stop such costly communication and, instead, communicate with impact?

Here are five ways that you can improve your personal and professional communication with others by using NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) techniques.

1.   Build instant rapport – Instantly create a feeling of trust and familiarity with anyone you meet, within seconds of meeting them.  While there are several NLP techniques you can use, a simple way to do this is to observe, then to subtly match or copy their posture ie. how they sit or stand.  This will allow the rest of your communication to be that much more effective because people who are like each other, like each other.

2.   Respect the other person’s views and beliefs - Each one of us has different experiences, memories, values and beliefs and these determine how we respond and react to situations and the world around us.  By respecting these differences, we can see the other person’s point of view and avoid disagreements and miscommunication.

3.    Chunk your information appropriately – Some people need a lot of detail before they can proceed with a task or make a decision, while others simply need to be told the big picture.  Give too much information to a big picture person and their eyes may glaze over and their thoughts may drift off to other things.  Leave out information for a detail person and they may not be interested in doing a task, not know how to do it or may even ask many questions in order to get the detail they need.

4.    Influence others through your questions - You can direct a conversation by asking appropriate NLP based questions.  Formulating questions such as “How specifically?” will assist in obtaining clarity and detail on an issue.  In contrast, using artfully vague language such as “You may have noticed...” allows others to come up with their own solutions and empowers them to resolve issues in their own way.

5.  Use appropriate words – Tailor the language you use to the other person.  From an NLP perspective, there are four major communication styles: visual (pictures), auditory (sounds), kinesthetic (feelings) and auditory digital (self talk), and each style uses specific words.  Most people use a combination of communication styles and some have a strong preference for one or two styles.  By identifying and utilising their preferred communication style with them, they will clearly see, easily get in touch with and understand what you are saying.

Remember that the most successful people are master communicators. They have developed the flexibility to adapt to other people and to ensure that their message is clearly heard each and every time.  You too can learn NLP techniques to stop those disagreements.  Now, imagine yourself using the above tools and becoming a master communicator.

 

Dr. Vesna Grubacevic is the founder of award-winning company Qt, an NLP Trainer, who holds a PhD in Clinical Hypnotherapy and a BEc and has over 29 year of business experience.  She is an author, speaker and the creator of breakthrough behavioural change techniques.  

© Qt, 2000 – 2011.  All Rights Reserved.

 

 


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